Life...has been going uphill and downhill. I don't know what's wrong with me, but all those things that happened have certainly left a huge impact on me. And that... affects me, my mood, my attitude a lot.

Mum was saying that i can't give people present, and that i wouldn't wish that my friends have bad luck. I wish i don't believe in that, because what i want, is to buy a present that i use my effort to choose and then hand it to them, seeing their smile. But now, i can't. And the feeling of not being able to give them anything, makes me feel as if i'm using that as an excuse to not buy anything. I hate it.

Because of school, i've been unable to spend time with Friends Evaz. I miss them. But i feel, nothing changes without me. That's a good sign, i'm glad. Because i know that at least that's me.. without me, its the same. But the memories, will always be kept inside me. Always.. School'd been so stressful. UT1 just ended, the week after will be UT2, thanks so much rp. Thank you. even my facilitator was like" omg, 2 exams, i don't like". See?!

I feel so stuffed up inside, its like i have so much kept within me, but ijust can't organise my thoughts.