Monday, May 2, 2011 | 10:32 PM | 0 hearts♥
Is my poly life just gonna be like this? Everyday's schedule just like secondary school? 8.30am starts, 3.30pm ends. Not only that, everything i do is different from my friends from other polys. Had sjab meeting on saturday, quite a long one and theres more to come, not only that i got more to learn compared to when i was still in school. Its been a long time since i touch paper work in sjab, operational schedule, lesson plan all these. And now with my current 2 postings,i have to learn to write Minutes. Yeah, like a secretary and then send it out. Sir kenneth was the one who did the latest one and woah, it was very very detailed. like wow.
I was wondering if i could ever do something like that ever in my life. Ok, then well, finally met up with vernesa they all. I missed them, and eric joined in our group. All of them are in Tp. =( haiz, and so, i had a quarrel with my mu because she thinks i have been with them and been outside too often, lol, i only went out with them twice. TWICE. And i don't know when i can meet them again. She just won't understand this point and said that my friends are more important then family. I kept quiet because i know what she's trying to imply. I didn't want the quarrel to get worse and i talked to her blah blah, and things are settled. I cried while quarrelling, that's me. I cry when i get angry and when i tried to scold the person. I don't know why but meichin they all know it and they know what to do when that happens. And that is to just keep quiet and leave me to clam down on my own. haha. I thought things will get better instead it got worse.
I checked my grades and saw it, the latest one was for Maths module and i first time got a C. And i hate it, was real angry inside me, and i just kept thinking what wrong did i do, i did particIpate, i did contribute, is it because of my reflection journal? And i thought, ya, should be. Because i was writing all my weaknesses on the rj and what i wrote was that "i'm a slow learner blah blah, please be understanding and have patience for me." because the question was something like what would you want your faci to know about you. Crap. I drank a huge mouth of water and it did help to cool me down, that is why i say water is my medicine. When i cry, i drink damn lots of water, when i'm angry i drink a lot of water too.
Now i miss dee dee they all. =( When can i see them. When? I keep having negative thoughts of myself, ugly blah blah. But my brother, dee dee they all, always manage to encourage me. Thats why, (gosh should i say this?) I LOVE THEM! (my god! i can't believe i'm typing this, but at least i typed it out not saying it)=) i feel like changing blogskin because i can't change the font for the words.
Is it really going to be like this?